Time for our yearly game of Escape from Colditz. This year we had four players so had three Escape Teams, I played the British, Dave played the Dutch and Maurice the Poles while George reprised his role from last year taking on the Germans!
The AAR...or should I say the Escapade!
The calendar was about to roll over to December 1944 and during the evening of November 30 in the wintery depths of Saxony the combined Escape Committees of Colditz Castle held a meeting. The leaders announced 'Big Week', since the secret French Camp Radio was picking up news of the rapid Allied advances toward the heart of Germany now was to be the time for every escape opportunity to be taken! The meeting ended with Dutch Majoor Van der Clogs declaring "Game On!" in his eerie accent...
So it was a quiet December day in Colditz Castle dawned, the Kommandant was sleeping in after a Friday Bingo with his officers...it was going to be just another ordinary week...or was it?
December the first was a Friday and Big Week started slowly as the British, Dutch and Polish Officers involved in organising escapes spent time acquiring the basic needs of an escape, they sourced; German Alpine Hats, outrageous Lederhosen, loads of sausage and sauerkraut wrapped in snack sized packages, rudimentary compasses and documents featuring official stamps made with carved potatoes! While all this was going on the German Guards flooded the main courtyard closely watching their charges and wondering at their skills at whittling potatoes!
Saturday the Second of December saw the first escape attempt, it featured a daring dash from the Orderlies Quarters across the Outer Courtyard to the Castle's Front Gate by British Lieutenant Long-Johns! He sprinted gracefully across the open ground like an Olympic Runner, then using fake papers he duped the Gate Guard and was on the outside! He commenced a casual stroll across the moat bridge only to be undone by a Camp Guard who noticed he was humming God Save the King, he was promptly apprehended before he cleared the moat! Curses!
Undaunted by the events of Saturday the Prisoners had plans for Sunday! Attention on the day was focused on the the Chapel, two Polish Officers using only toothpicks and a coffee cup had already dug a tunnel that cleared the wire, it was time to use it! Assisted by British Escape Committee member Major Loss Polish Officers Lejtnants Dribbleinski and Hujewicz made a try at a home run! Lejtnant Dribbleinski sprinted till his lungs burst and made it away into the forest, unfortunately a pot shot from a Camp Guard ended Lejtnant Hujewicz escape in tragedy!
Using the confusion caused by Lejtnant Hujewicz's demise Major Loss managed to slip away into the woods! Two Home Runs in the one Innings! Huzzah! Kommandant Goerg was not happy.
The Dutch had a poor start to "Big Week", acquiring a Key to the Main Gate before collecting all their Escape Kit led to a series of unfortunate events in the Inner Courtyard and a few Dutch officers ending up in the cells! Despite their setbacks Monday lunchtime saw another extraordinary escape begin! Dutch Luitenant Van der Rooty donned a German Uniform made from sewn bits of dyed toilet paper and using rope twisted from lengths of body hair exited the Orderlies Quarters and headed to the Camp Garage where he fired up Kommandant Georg's personal Mercedes! Flooring it he made a run for safety in the big black limousine! Unfortunately war shortages in Germany cut short his freedom...the Mercedes ran out of petrol just yards outside the castle's Main gate...Luitenant Van der Rooty was frog marched to the cells!
...and trouble it was, the enterprising Poles had dug another tunnel using nothing more than teaspoons! During Tuesday Roll Call as Prisoners from the British, Dutch and Polish contingents prepared to use the tunnel the Germans surprised them, they crumped the tunnel and arrested the Poles! The cells of Colditz Castle were filling fast!
Wednesday and with 'Big Week' coming to and end Polish Lejtnant Rynkidynki fresh from Solitary tried to escape again! He was captured just outside the wire after launching a daring off the cuff escape attempt from the Dentistry after receiving Root Canal Surgery! He later said he prefer to be shot trying to escape rather than face the Camp Dentist again!
Thursday and Friday of "Big Week" were a doddle for the Camp Guards! Severe winter weather (read poor dice rolling) kept the Prisoners in check! Several plans were in place but none came to fruition; British Captain Tee-Cup Smythe was hiding in the Outer Courtyard Garage disguised as a 44 Gallon Drum just waiting for a chance to escape via the path near the Guards Barracks but no opportunity showed itself, Dutchman Kapitein Van der Derr was poised in the Guards Room with 120 feet of rope in his trousers but no gap in the searchlights before him appeared, he was left gutted and lastly British Captain Piles spent the full two days in the Sick Bay pretending to be suffering from haemorrhoids but he was not offered a chance to quit the Castle!
So it was after Seven Days (well actually two and a half hours) stumps were called! Three Prisoners were in position to attempt a Home Run and were were laden with all the equipment required but were lacking lucky dice while cocky Camp Guards fearful of Kommandant Georg continued to furtively patrol the castle!
This year again the Germans put up a a jolly good show while the Escape Committees tried their hardest to hit as may 'Home Runs' as possible! Importantly everyone had a great time, fun was had by all 😃! Happy New Year!
Oh and here’s the official summary...
Germans: Had 2 Prisoners escape and prevented 5 escapes attempts
Polish: scored 1 Home Run and had 3 unsuccessful escape attempts
British: scored 1 Home Run and had 1 unsuccessful escape attempts
Dutch: had 1 unsuccessful escape attempts
So as we say every year everyone was a winner!
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